You know what I think? I think that we all deserve better. I think that they need to make up their minds, figure out what they want. If they want us, they’re going to have to fight for us, because we’re going to find someone so much better than them, someone that actually deserve us; someone that makes us look at them and go “what the hell was I thinking?"

Mrng guys, I'm awake! (๑╹ڡ╹)╭ ～ ♡

Gave Pulau Ubin a miss, too tired alr! Luckily this trip was being cancelled and none of them are there right now, it's raining cats and dogs. Lovely weather to sleep though ^.^ So guys, what's the plans for tonight?

Nevermind, I'll find someone like you.

You're my biggest regret.

You disappoint me a lot. But it's okay, I loved you. Not anymore.

Now, I know how much I exactly mean to you. Now, I know what you always treat me as. Now, I know I'm finally giving up on you.

He knows you care, that's why he doesn't.

Agree much?

You're all backstabbing bitches who judge people by their looks and not personalities. You judge, you lie, you deceive and you think that anything slightly over the fine line is the extreme. You don't kiss someone, you're frigid. You kiss someone, you're a slut. You don't wear make up, you're ugly. You wear make up, you're plastic. You let people in straight away, you're easy. You take a bit of time to let people in, you're too hard to get along with. Let me clear this up for you. Nobody's perfect, everyone's different, and no matter what you all think, you can all go suck a dick because your judgmental opinion doesn't fucking matter to any of us.

Lazy Friday

Gave school a miss today, feeling really super sleepy early in the morning when I woke up. Went back to bed, wanted to have a power nap for like maybe 15 to 30 mins but when I woke up, it's already almost 12 in the noon. So, no choice and since I've got nothing to do, I went back to sleep again. Ha ha ha really sibeh joke I can just keep sleeping only.................................

I think I got a fucking weird sickness seriously. Recently, I've been changing the colors of my nails every fucking single day. I just changed it, lol!

Okay, it's Friday today and I'm still thinking if I should party? I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to wake up early tmr for Pulau Ubin with the clique ): But let's say if I'm not partying tonight, what else is there for me to do?

Talk again, xx!

It's funny how he does nothing, but you continue to fall for him.

What if we never met?

There's a guy I really like and he's done something really terrible to me. I still like him, but I can't be with him.

Just because we don't talk doesn't mean I don't think about you. I'm just trying to distance myself because I know I can't have you.

Mrng guysxz I'm up! (◕‿-)

I wna go on liquid diet for the next few days/

11/11/11

Holla guys. It's 11/11/11 right now, was glad that I was with Pkw just now, hehe. Just removed my mask, and I'm feeling a little sleepy already. Gonna turn in right after this entry, kept yawning non-stop!

Anywho, went for dins with Lucas earlier on at Scape's Sakae Sushi. Had an awesome but really sinful dinner, sushi buffet always made me regret at the end of the day, really no joke. Waste money + Fattening = )':

Parted with Lucas after the dinner, headed to Bugis to pick Pkw up from work. Headed to Macs for his dinner, the look on his face when he's eating srsly LOL to the max one, haha! He just had quite a number of his teeth plucked two days back and it was still pretty uncomfortable for him, so the way he ate his food seriously looks super cute!

Alright, these are some pictures taken yesterday & today itself:

Billy Kamikaze

Adam

Alvin

Mokkie

Billy Kamikaze

Bestbest <3

Lol, alright gonna end this entry with a pic of myself!

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Ta-dahhhhh scary much? Ha ha ha, with my mask before removing it just now!

Alright, gonna turn in now.

Have a goodnight guys, xx!

Everything I loved, I began to hate.

You didn't love her, because you don't destroy the person you love.

Relationships end because once the person has you, they stop doing things it took to get you.

Right now, I just want someone to kiss my forehead and tell me how lucky they are to have someone like me.

It was a tough day. Or rather, a tough night. Fuck 11/11/11 seriously _l_

LOL at my love life

I just fucking miss you so much.

People do have a power over us even after they're gone.

I will never understand..

I will never understand why I ended up this way or what the reason was for. I'll never understand why this world is so fucked up and barely anyone cares. I'll never understand how people can say they love someone then leave them for someone else. I'll never understand a lot of things, like why people lie, cheat, and steal. Why they're rude, bitchy, mean, horrible, and inconsiderate. I'll never understand how pain never goes away. I'll never understand love or hate. I'll never understand life.

Awesome night

It was an awesome night at rebel last night. It was a pity Alex & myself have to leave early. Well, met Pkw after that, stayed over and I just got home! Gonna go get myself prepared for school now, will be uploading some pics when I'm back! Stay tuned ^.^

xoxo.

It's Wednesday!

Just got back home from school, about an hour ago? Was on the piano, wanted to post up FFX's To Zanarkand's cover but can't seemed to play it well today. Pretty disappointed because it's a really pretty piece.

Played by others, super beautiful piece:

Maybe tmr or someday this week I'll do the piano cover again!

Btw, it's Wednesday today. Pkw says he maybe gng club zz. I didn't want to party, but now I'm considering already since that's the case, should I?! Hmmmm........

Alright, gonna go back to Tumblr now.

Talk again, xx!

You think it was tough out there? Think it was easy for me without you? You thought that everyday wasn't a goddamn marathon of my life without you?!

I would like to start over again, please.

I'm in the need of being rescued. All heroes please apply.

Suicide isn't cowardly. I'll tell you what's cowardly: Treating someone so badly that they want to end their life.

Mrng guys.

Got up since 2 hours back but I'm still feeling pretty sleepy and lazy for school so gave the first lesson a miss. Will be in school at 1pm later though. I think I wna nap awhileeeeeeeeee before I attend school ltr but I'm afraid I'd overselpt ): How how how..

So if you love me, why'd you let me go?

‘I love you’ means that I accept you for the person that you are, and that I do not wish to change you into someone else. It means that I will love you and stand by you even through the worst of times. It means loving you even when you’re in a bad mood, or too tired to do the things I want to do. It means loving you when you’re down, not just when you’re fun to be with. ‘I love you’ means that I know your deepest secrets and do not judge you for them, asking in return that you do not judge me for mine. It means that I care enough to fight for what we have and that I love you enough not to let go. It means thinking of you, dreaming of you, wanting and needing you constantly, and hoping you feel the same way for me.

Never lie to the girl of your life, for the hoe of the night.

I can't do anything right. My life's in a mess.

Stop holding on to what hurts and make room for what feels good.

I don't think you realize what you mean to me, not the slightest clue.

Done!

Just done painting my nails, waiting for em' to dry up! ^.^

So how, nice? Lol, my first attempt!

It was a long day today. Attended school this morning, ended at 11am. Spent sometime with Pkw before heading home, was so super sleepy at that point of time. Got myself changed and doll up, then headed to town to meet Mommy. Today wear like relaxxxx only, lol. A long top, leggings, flats. It's been so long since I last worn flats to town. But srsly have to allow my poor feet to rest after wearing 4inches, 5 inches for the past few days....... Wanted to exchange my iPhone but it's already out of warranty ): Anyways, headed to Ang Mo Kio to meet Pkw after his dental appointment. Poor boy, he looked so super upset after plucking out two of his teeth. Couldn't even speak well, haha! Cabbed back to Simei after that, dabao my Tomyam Banmian before heading home!

Well, I won't be partying tmr so guys please, don't try to tempt me ok! No, means no.

Talk again, xx!

I don't know what am I waiting for, but I still continue to wait anyways.

I'm bored.

Gonna do some manicure & watch funshion/

I wish I could say that I don't care about what you think, but that's not true. I care about what you think, & I always hope you're thinking of me.

I wish you were here or I were there or we were together anywhere.

I want to do everything with you.

I want to wake up next to you, eat with you, get changed with you, play computer games with you, watching movies with you in bed, hold your hand and watch tv, send you cute texts, buy you gifts, nap together, wear your comfy hoody when I'm cold, look into your eyes, be with you at sunrise and sunset, cook for you, walk in the rain with you, fall asleep whilst on the phone with you, snuggle in bed, mess up your hair, kiss you goodnight.

Life's a bitch.

Girls are much more than what they seem. They're more than just the make up, the clothes, the shoes, the bags, the sunglasses, the outside. They're more than just whiny bitches. We're so much more.. Too bad some boys can't understand. A girl's life is a bitch itself. On a daily basis, we deal with bitches, backstabbers, lies, boyfriends, crushes, exes, appearance, insecurity, bullying and so much more. Everyday we wake up, we have to shower. We have to fix our hair. Then, we have to get dressed. We spend hours infront of our mirror for you, making sure we look good. Then, we have to apply make up. While doing all these, there's too much to consider.. Especially gossipers and guys. If something's too short, they'll call us a whore. Something's too long, they'll call us ugly. We go through buckets full of ice cream because we've had too many broken hearts. We cry because bitches wanna hate and boyfriends wanna bitch. We can't complain because we don't wanna be annoying. We trust people, then they end up stabbing us in the back. We learn stuff the hard way. Every guy out there making a period joke, like are you for real? No. Just because you're being a little bitch and pissing me off doesn't mean I'm on my period. Get over it. We get hurt multiple times, and keep running back to the same people. We love hard, and hurt hard. We care too much. We're never understood. We go through so much trouble when you don't even notice. We listen to songs till 5 in the morning and fall asleep to it because it reminds us of you. We try so hard to impress you, while dealing with all that's said about us. After everything, we sit our asses down on Tumblr and reblog everything that reminds us of you. We spill our guts out to our bestfriends who've probably had enough of you. We go on Facebook and we check your profile a million times, and go through all your pictures, even if we have seen them all before. We hear what people say about us, and sometimes we break inside. But no matter what, after everything, we have to come out strong. We have to put a big smile on our faces and pretend that everything's okay. We have to act nice towards the haters, even knowing everything that they said about us. We love even though we know we shouldn't, and we wait for something that will never happen. But no matter what, we manage to act like everything's fine, even though everything's falling apart. That's a day in a girl's life. Imagine dealing with all that everyday? We're so much more than what you think, so much more than what we seem.

Hari Raya @ Powerhouse.

Okayyyyy I almost forgot to post about last night at Powerhouse. Lol, was a pretty last minute decision to party last night. Met Alex, and trained over. Luckily we managed to catch the last train lol! Met Lucas & the rest there.

Anywho, yeah was an awesome night there except for afew incident that actually happened to myself. Lesson learnt anyway, first and also the last time. I won't be telling you guys what actually happened, it was a pretty silly & stupid mistake made. No more second time! I'm supposed to leave the club at around 3am but because of that incident I've got no choice but to stay till lights on. Went for supper with Dj Jerryca Misty & Mc Nigel Sparks, with Amirul, Alex, Lucas & his cousin DJ Victor Trixter at Geylang. Lol, went home at around 6am. Was an awesome night, it was a pity I forgot my camera ):

Just got home after meeting Pkw. Gonna turn in in awhile's time, feeling sleepy already!

Gn guys, xx!

Blood Creekkkkkkk

Sup guys. I just got home about half an hour back. Feeling really sleepy right now but srsly don't feel like gng to bed yet. Yet to wash up, yet to shower, yet to do everything, have been sitting here right infront of my desktop since half an hour back when I just got home. Ha ha ha.

Anywho, went for a movie over at Cineleisure just now. Met Yanhao & co instead. Caught Blood Creek, it's motherfucking gore I swear. Super gross, like v v v v v gross. No wonder it's M18 tsk. Anyways, went right home after that and yup here I am updating this space.'

Alright, back to tumblr. Talk again, xx!

Moved fucking on _|_

I fall too fast, crash too hard, forgive too easy, and care too much.

I would rather spend this day in school

I'm so bored I'm dying this boredom is killing me

Real girls stay, hoes come and go. Little boys play around, real men settle down.

I’d rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else. I’d rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself. I’d rather have hard times together than to have it easy apart, remember I love you.

I keep thinking you're just going to randomly text me and tell me all the feelings you've been hiding. The same ones I have. That you remember all the cute things I did, all the stupid stuff I've said. That you'll just text me and tell me I'm the one you want. The one you keep thinking about. I want you to tell me the only reason you left was because you got scared of the feelings you had or because you wanted me too much. Just anything that would give me the slightest bit of hope.

I tried so hard, but I'm never the one.

I can't tell if it's killing me, or making me stronger.

I've changed so much in the past year, good and bad. I've lost a lot of people I was close to, but I've also met new people that have changed me for the better. One thing I've learned is that the people whom I thought gonna stay, leave. And when they do, you realized they're not who you thought they were. I'm just glad I see them for what they are.

The important thing is to not be bitter over life’s disappointments. Learn to let go of the past & recognize that everyday won’t be sunny. And when you find yourself lost in the darkness of despair, remember that it’s only in the black of night that you see the stars, & those stars lead you back home.

I miss you, goodnight.

I thought I was done with feeling like this.

I'm not going to be stressed over you. I'm not going to regret being with you. But you'll be stressing and regretting when you see me happier without you.

Are you happy?

You lost me/

Sometimes there is nothing to be said. Sometimes nothing should be said. I just want to find someone who won’t run away. Someone to look me in the eyes and tell me it’s okay, that things don’t always go right. That is how life works, and how it will always work. That it’s not going to be easy. Today, Tomorrow, the next day, but it will somehow get better.

If I woke up beside you every morning I'd be more of a morning than a nightlife person.

Pictures taken last night:

Bestbest ♥

Finally turned 18, Ollie-wannabe!

Bestbest ♥

Still thinking if I should go to PH with bestbest & Alex tonight, how?! Vexed much zzzz.

And soon, you'll see how things have turned out for the better.

Mrng guys, I just got up not long ago. Like about 10minutes ago? Ha ha ha. Right now, still nuaing on bed, damn lazy to do anything else. Still feeling really sleepyyy.........

Anywho, was at Rebel last night. It was so packed it pretty much suck balls. It's Alex's 18th birthday last night, so yup lol. It was his virgin trip to Rebel and I think he didn't really like it there. Ha ha ha. I guess I'll be giving myself a break from partying for maybe the next one to two weeks. I know I've been saying this since forever but I really am getting so sick and tired of partying already. Yeah, so have some faith in me okay guys. Lol!

Ah, today shall be a stay home Sunday for me. And there's no school tmr! Hurray ^^

Talk soon guys, xx!

The feelings I always have for you, seems a little different now. What's happening?

I’ve got ice in my veins. Blood in my eyes. Hate in my heart. Love in my mind.

Maybe I'm just supposed to let you go now, but I can't. Because I can't lose everything I have all at once.

I love you, & it's killing me.

If he misses you, he'll call.
If he wants you, he'll say it.
And if he cares, he'll show it.
If not, he can't be worth your time because you're obviously not worth his.

Have you ever loved someone whom never loved you back?

Last night when I was outside the club talking to Chester, he asked me this question. I was like " HELL YES! I'm right now in this situation and it's so totally fucked up" And we were like yay we're in the same boat ha ha ha.

I don't know. I mean, I want to be his friend. But then again, I don't. You know? How can you be friends with someone when each and every time you look at them, you're thinking about how much more you really want.

A human's life is a beautiful mess.

Holla guys, I just got up not long ago. Still feeling abit sleepy seriously.......... Anywho, last night was a blast. Ha ha ha, had an awesome night at Rebel. Will be heading to Rebel again tonight, celebrating Alex's 18th birthday as planned a week back. Hopefully it'll be a great night!

Some pictures taken last night:

Alright, imma get back to Tumblr now guys.

Talk soon, xx!

Never ignore a person who loves you and cares for you. One day you may realise you've lost the moon while counting the stars.

So here I am, I'm trying not to love you anymore.

Sometimes, I wonder..

During the days I'm over it, during the nights I still cry.

I don't hate you. I'm just disappointed you turned into everything you said you'd never be.

I'm so tired of being the girl who keeps crying over the same shits.

Mrng guys, I just got up. Damn nuasxz srsly, even blogging through phone lol. What's the plans for today guys?! It's Friday! Have a good day ahead people!ヾ(◍'౪`◍)ﾉﾞ

Talking to the moon.

I don't understand how you can smile all day long and cry yourself to sleep at night. How pictures never change but the people in them do. How your best friend can become your worst enemy, or how strange it is when your worst enemy turns into your best friend. How a forever turns into a few short months that you'd do almost everything to get it back. How you can let go of something you once said you couldn't live without. How even though you know something is best for you, it just hurts the same. How the people who once wanted to spend every second with you, think a few minutes of their life is too much to spare. How people make promises despite knowing how common it is for promises to be broken. How people can erase you from their lives just because it's easier than working things out.

I lost myself.

My emotions change so drastically everyday. I could feel on top of the world then, suddenly, I am numb. Seconds from breaking down. It's scary.

So happy one second, incredibly depressed the next.

But everytime I try to move on, you're right there.

累了，我真的累了。

I miss you, you miss her.

/这种感觉一点也不好受，但什么也不能做. 感觉自己真的很没有用，像个笨蛋.

I was praying that you and me might end up together.

Holla guys. It's right now 3:06am in the morning and as usual, I'm still up. Went to catch Paranormal Activity 3 earlier on with Alexander, so reluctantly. Seriously, I won't want to watch anymore movies related to horror, gore, thriller and paranormal. Paid 7 bucks, just to scare myself. Seriously feeling so paranoid after watching PA3, totally hate it. Hello you, sleepless nights!

Well, it's supposed to be a long day in school today but things kind of cocked up. Career Fair held in my college today, so there were students from other colleges visiting my school for the fair. So yeap, met up with quite a few of my friends from Bishan & Macpherson ITE, ha ha ha. Lesson's at 12, reached school at 2, reached class at 4, end class at 4:30. Seriously?! I really have got no idea wtf am I even in school today. I did nothing. Literally nothing.

Last minute decision to party last night. Went to Rebel as usual, but this time round without Jasmine. Met up with the clique outside Rebel, then decided to head over to Titanium with Berdine & co. Drank abit, then cabbed home with Berdine & Pkw. And whatever happened this morning, totally ruined my mood. But it's okay, try to tank!

Gonna go for a puff and then turn in. Hopefully I'll be able to sleep well and have a peaceful night, after such a horrible film. Ha ha ha. Gn guys, xx!

It is everything that you do and say, even the littlest thing, that keeps me going.

Sometimes, you end up losing yourself trying to hold onto someone who doesn't care about losing you.

You need to know how much she's giving up for you. So don't break her heart.

Paranormal Activity 3

/Tampines Mall

Forget shit and move on.

It’s okay to cry, it’s okay to be sad about it. It’s okay to miss him, and it’s okay to wish you did something differently. But never blame yourself for how things turned out. Never tell yourself you can’t do better, and never tell yourself this is the end of the road. Fate has a time and place for all us and nothing you can do or say will change that. Sure, it’s okay to fall, but it’s never okay to stay down.

Sometimes, I forgive people simply because I still want them in my life.

Because I do, we girls do.

I wonder how boys feel when they're in love. Do they get butterflies? Do they have you on their mind 24/7? Do they wait for you to come online for hours? Do they fall asleep with their phone in their hands while waiting for your call/text? Do they smile at random times at the thought of you? Do they miss you all the time? Do they think about the smallest thing you say? Do they think about the littlest thing you do?

Society makes people feel like a piece of shit.

My grades need to be higher. My weight needs to be lower. My stomach needs to be flatter. My wallet needs to be fatter. My skin needs to be tanner. My teeth need to be whiter. My heart needs to be stronger. My friends need to be uglier. My face needs to be prettier. My hair needs to be longer. My skirt needs to be shorter. My body needs to be hotter. My image needs to be cooler. My boobs need to be bigger. My waist needs to be smaller. Damn, society really knows how to make you feel like a piece of shit.

l.o.v.e

I'm sorry. Sometimes I get a jealous thinking that someone else could make you happier than I could. I guess it's my insecurities acting up. Because I know that I'm not the prettiest, smartest, or most fun and exciting. But, I do know that no matter how hard and long you look, you'll never find somebody that loves you like I do.

It is the good and the bad, sunshine and rain. It is the chances we had and the choices we made.

Never ever forget the things that once made you smile.

Randomxsz

Just got back from school. Finally, after almost 2 weeks, I'm back in school uniform. Hahaha, I know it's pretty rabak right, but seriously can't commit to what I'm studying right now. Integrated Logistics Mgmt, oh.my.god.

Okay, it's Wednesday today I know and I'm determined not to party tonight. Lol, hopefully I won't change my mind at the very last minute and people, please don't tempt me k xiexieni!

Ohyaaaa btw, I seriously think there's twitter ghost in my Twitter! It's like, people who doesn't follow me, actually knows what I'm tweeting. Ha ha ha, have to be more careful while accepting followers already. Sibeh scary k, hmmmmm.

Talk again soon!

Mommy, I love you! (๑˙❥˙๑)

Sad truth: People Change.

Nobody knows what I am going through right now. Even I myself, have got no idea what the fuck is going on with my life. It just suck so hard I can imagine myself breaking down out of a sudden. Often telling myself to move on but in the end, I will still be right here, at the same exact spot. Ha ha ha, seems so silly but oh well.. Sometimes it's just not possible to just let everything go like as if they're a total nothingness when they actually meant THAT much to you. God bless me.