Its been a year. After so long, we finally ended things. Somehow, I'm still not ready to put everything behind. Though, I know I won't be going back to you anymore. Gonna try my best to move on with life.
Still remember, when we first started around April last year, I felt that I was the luckiest girl to have you with me. Time flies, and too, things have changed so much after this one year. Although we've never been in a relationship, I've always treated you as my boyfriend. Somehow, it's also my fault to ruin this relationship of ours. My really bad clubbing and drinking habits, have totally changed this everything I've cherished so much. It was when I lost you, then I came to realize how important it is to me, how important you are to me. Even till now, I will not deny, you're still my priority. It's always been so. Even when I know I'm never your priority.
One year, it's not too long nor too short. We've been through a lot though. Of course, our time spent together wasn't as much as how the normal couples get to spent together. Though, I really enjoyed times with you. We fought a lot, we quarreled every few days, but it somehow brought us closer. I hated your hot and cold attitude towards me and this relationship. I hated almost everything you did to me and this relationship. But still, I know how much you meant to me deep down.
We were never like the normal lovebirds. We were never like the normal couples. I can't hold your hands when we're out, I can't hold your hands when we're w your friends. I somehow feels that you're feeling embarrassed when you're with me, but still, I took everything in. I thought everything would be okay, would be fine if I just give in. I'm not saying that I've gave in a lot for this relationship of ours, I'm just saying I hate it when we quarrel or argue over silly stuffs and I was just trying prevent things like that from happening. It definitely hurts a lot in the beginning, but slowly, I got so used to the pain, I put on a hard shell.
I used to yearn for a status of a "Girlfriend", but as time goes by, I just want you to love me more. I don't even care about having a status or not anymore. Status doesn't seem that important to me anymore. I tried doing everything to make you love me. It was silly, cuz in the end, everything I did is still a total nothingness to you.
Well, I guess we're just a mistake since the very beginning. Everything between us, shouldn't have started. And for now, I just want to move on with my life as soon as possible. If we were to continue being like that, things are going no where I know it deep down, we know it. There's been so many times whereby I just really wanna give up on you but I failed to in the end, went back to you time after time, things are still not getting any better. In fact, it got worse.
I've made up my mind. You want to be heartless towards both me and this relationship I can be heartless too. From today onwards, I'm not gna talk about you anymore. Not on my Facebook, my Twitter, or even to my friends. Too, I won't want to still be friends with you. Being friends after all these, it's just way too silly. I'll take it as we've never known each other before. It's gna be really hard for me, I know, but still, I've promised myself I've to be strong. Goodbye to you JPKW. It's been a tough year for us, hopefully things will get better for me and you after ending this relationship. Hopefully it'll be a better year. I have loved you, way too much than you can ever imagine.
And now, I'm letting you go.
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